Speaking of cops...

Guess who not only wants to be a cop, but an undercover cop.

Yes that's right, Shaq. Hmm Shaq undercover. I think the only way that Shaq is going to go undercover is to pose as a tree or maybe a light pole or something else that could hide a 7-foot plus, 325-pound man.
Actually to be fair, it says Shaq wants to go on the computer and pretend he is a little girl so he can arrest all the creepy internet predators. Boy, would that add insult to injury? "Yeah apparently, what I thought was a 13 year old girl was actually a giant black man."
And can I also admit I love Shaq's poetry skills? I mean his simile's and metaphors are so great. Here are a couple:

In reference to Dikembe Mutombo playing him in that one finals awhile back, "treat me like a game of checkers and play me. Just play me. Treat me like Sega and play me."

Shaq on retirement, "I realize that the newer models outshine the older models. So when this 1992 Mercedes doesn't shine no more, I'll go in the garage, shut the garage and retire. But right now, this 1992 Mercedes is still a powerful m_____ f_____. I've got that engine, I've got nice rims, I look (bleeping) good, and I'll do what I've been doing."

When being traded from the Lakers... "I told my wife the other day, I'm the Halle Berry of the NBA,"

When Phil Jackson was let go... "Phil took us to the finals three out of the five years and you want to fire him and want to bring in Mike Krzyzewski? Come on, man. That's like being married to J-Lo, then dropping J-Lo for a girl that's 5-10, 480 (pounds)."

"I got somebody, that other guy, who is just as lethal. He's a little bit younger, he got a lot of proving to do, but he's just as lethal. It's my job to make him lethaler, it's my job to make him the lethalest, if that's a word ..."

Shaq did once say that he is a very, "quotacious" person.